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It’s often overlooked that one can increase productivity, performance, and happiness by taking their feet out of a few of life’s quagmires. Simply put, it pays to know when to say enough is enough and jump ship from a person, responsibility, or opportunity in order to start looking for a more lucrative one.
When things aren’t going your way, or when something requiring effort isn’t bringing you the rewards you want, there are two ways that most people believe you can go.
- You can keep at it and hope things will change with enough time and effort (The ‘respected’ and ‘desirable’ way to do things).
- You can quit and absolve yourself of any responsibility for whatever the scenario might be (The ‘quitter’s way out;).
Neither of these two options sounds particularly fantastic when you really think about it. Option #1 has you continuing to spend your limited resources on a reward that might not even reveal itself, while #2 brands you as incompetent and irresponsible. What if a third option existed however?
Option 3 – ‘Nexting’
Nexting is when you’ve come to the conclusion that whatever it is you are putting effort into is not worth the time or energy, therefore you decide to say ‘next’ and move onto the next opportunity available. I know what many are probably thinking after reading that definition – “That’s just the same thing as option 2!” – “You’re still quitting by Nexting!” – and you would be right to remain cynical about that.
What’s great about Nexting though is that it takes the positive aspects of Option #2 e.g. allowing yourself to conserve resources by cutting off a toxic responsibility, and its line of thinking allows you to take a positive attitude towards it.
When you have decided to do away with a person not worth your time, or perhaps a responsibility not worth your time, there is simply no benefit to feeling guilty about it, nor is it beneficial to brand yourself a ‘quitter’ or a ‘failure’. Instead, it is better to emphasise an abundance mentality and focus on the next important person or opportunity.
By Nexting instead of quitting you are seeing value in all of your opportunities by being aware that there are always more out there to put meaningful time and effort into.
A Context for Nexting
It’s important to keep in mind that taking an attitude of Nexting is not always going to be appropriate depending on your values. Some areas of life are a more snug fit for this type of outlook than others.
The perfect breeding ground for the Nexting attitude is one in which you are sieving people or opportunities for the proverbial needle in a haystack. Any area of life where you feel you can go through multiple opportunities until you find the right one is golden for Nexting. We’ll go through a couple of these areas.
Nexting in Jobs
Unless you’re desperate for work, you can apply Nexting to the plethora of positions you apply to.
Job won’t pay you as high as you would like? Next. Job doesn’t offer enough flexibility of hours? Next. Job doesn’t give you the roles and responsibility you desire? Next.
Why push yourself through something that doesn’t bring you the happiness and resources that you need? Now, in regards to work, it can be a bit volatile in that you must be realistic with what to expect, as well as the fact that you can’t keep Nexting forever. But by focusing on the fact that you have declined to put any more thought or time into an opportunity because it’s not giving you what you want is liberating in that you are in complete control of what happens.
This type of outlook is much more healthy than having an external locus of control where you believe that whatever you get is what just tends to happen to you, instead you are in control of what goes on. Take a sensible Nexting attitude to jobs and you’ll (hopefully) quickly sieve through opportunities that aren’t worth your time in the long-term in favour of finding something perfect for you. You’ll also diminish any unneeded feelings of guilt associated with quitting or shunning an opportunity as you are simply moving onto something better.
Nexting in Dating
This is perhaps the very best ground for Nexting in that the game of dating is already about sieving people down in order to find the best match.
Regardless of your sex, most people dating are looking for something specific in a potential mate. Sure there has to be some acknowledgement that there likely isn’t someone out there who doesn’t hold some traits you consider undesirable, but you can separate people by who does and who doesn’t possess some key traits that you hold dear.
Your potential date takes too much effort to contact? Next. Do they have a little habit you don’t like? Next. They’re not blonde? Next.
I’ve been deliberately flippant with the line above on purpose to illustrate that you can sieve out any qualities you really do not want. Instantly Nexting someone based on the fact that they don’t possess the trait you are looking for is as easy as just doing nothing. You can pretend they don’t even exist, it really doesn’t matter one way or the other.
However, Like Nexting in jobs, you will only make it harder on yourself if your standards are unworkable and unrealistic. There has to be some level of give and take or you simply end up with nothing. Be sensible with this simple outlook, which many people forget, that you are in control of most of the people and opportunities that you get exposed to, simply opt out of them if they don’t suit you.
Invest Your Limited Resources Wisely
If you prize being efficient and valuing your time, taking a Nexting outlook towards some areas of your life may save you some unneeded time and effort. Remember that even if you Next something that may have been good for you, there are almost infinite more opportunities out there to grasp.
Don’t let your precious and limited resources be drained by people and responsibilities that really are not worth investing in.